Moving Blog Posts to www.tojoeapen.com/blog

Dear friends, readers,

I have moved my blog posts to www.tojoeapen.com/blog.

This page, www.tojoeapen.blogspot.in will be removed in the coming weeks and all my future posts will be on the new page.

Thank you for following, your valuable inputs and encouragement.

Look forward to connecting with you on www.tojoeapen.com/blog.

Sincerely,
Tojo

Tojo Eapen

Fundamental Question To Ask Yourself In Any Interaction

We have all sensed, acted or reacted based on this and would think it makes sense, even if it may be unconscious during our interactions.  Most expert communicators and socially intelligent people have inherently known and used this approach.  Thanks to neuroscience research, the findings provide a solid reason to understand this.

The fundamental question to ask yourself in any interaction:

AM I CREATING A "TOWARD" (APPROACH) STATE OR "AWAY" (AVOID) STATE IN MY INTERACTIONS?

This applies to any interaction in our world of work and personal relationships.

According to neuroscience studies:

• Our brains are more tuned to picking up threats in the environment and the threat response is easily triggered.
• It is easier to cause aggravation than it is to help other think rationally and creatively.
• In the threat state, our brain is disengaged due to related activity and 'noise', resulting in reduced cognitive performance. There is also a high possibility of an "emotional hijack". We also know that emotions are contagious and can spread.
• The organizing, overarching principle of the brain is to minimize danger (threat state) and maximize rewards (towards state).
• If a stimulus is associated with positive emotions, it will most likely lead to an approach response; if it is associated with negative emotions, it will lead to an avoid response.  From our experiences, we know that we naturally try to avoid uncomfortable interactions, situations or difficult people.
• An approach response is synonymous with the idea of engagement and closely linked to positive emotions.

So next time you think about starting a conversation in person, over the phone or virtually, ask yourself: Do I want to create a "towards" (approach) state or an "away" (avoid) state? How can I create a "towards" state?

In the world around you, what percentage of "towards" state interactions vs. "away" state interactions do you notice?

Reference, Recommended Reading:
SCARF..., David Rock: http://www.your-brain-at-work.com/files/NLJ_SCARFUS.pdf

How Much Of You Is Your Job Title or Position? Importance of Humility & Wisdom

To my dear friends, colleagues and readers,

Here are some questions for you:

If you were to lose your important position, title or social status today,

1. What would happen to you?
2. How would you feel, behave?
3. How would your existing relationships shift? How would they respond?

Many people in today's world seem to lose touch with their authentic selves once they get used to the trappings of an important corporate job, title and perceived power.  Humility goes down.  Arrogance creeps in.  Ego grows rapidly.  Respect factor goes down. A feeling of invincibility kicks in.

One starts believing or over relying on one's belief, status of positions and unconsciously start feeling that these will last forever.  

Why does one need to reflect and be aware of the line between confidence and over confidence/arrogance?

Like most things in life, nothing lasts forever.  Life involves ups and downs, successes and challenges, pleasures and pains.  Sometimes, unexpected shifts in one's life can cause lots of pain, be humbling and bring one to reality that we are  all in fact mortal.  They may come forth in the form of unexpected job challenges, health issues with self or loved ones, losing someone close, personal issues etc.

If most of your relationships are formed and defined around your perceived social status and not your authentic selves, it may be helpful to be prepared for surprises and pains when life starts to present difficult moments. 

It is helpful to be in touch with one's own authentic self and values.  When the rough times appear, this prepares one more to maneuver through, similar to an anchor that holds a ship stable in rough waters. In today's socially networked world, corporate or social hierarchy does not necessarily indicate level of influence or impact. Therefore, it's helpful to be aware of arrogant behavior and where that may or may not lead one to. 

Letting go of the trappings even for a bit can be a refreshing experience and reality check for oneself and the world of relationships.

I think most of us go through similar scenarios as we progress in our careers and lives.  What is important is to build awareness, consciousness, learning and wisdom. This will help to navigate rough waters whenever they come next.

According to Professor Ursula Staudinger, a life span psychologist and professor at Columbia University, true personal wisdom involves five elements. They are self-insight; the ability to demonstrate personal growth; self-awareness in terms of your historical era and your family history; understanding that priorities and values, including your own, are not absolute; and an awareness of life’s ambiguities.

Wishing you humility, wisdom and true success in your journey.

Additional Suggested Reading: Top five regrets of the dying, http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying

Trust Guidance for Leaders

One of the common discussions that I've come across in leadership discussions in organizations is "How do we build trust?".  I've thought about this question from two perspectives - building trust at an individual level and at an organizational level.  If one wonders what the difference is, trust needs to start with individual actions in direct interactions and they have to be manifested to a wider audience or stakeholders through organizational processes, practices and systems. Multiple studies have found that trust is a crucial factor for team performance, including in sports. This applies to any type of organization.

This post focuses on the individual aspect.  Trust can be built more consciously at an individual level with fundamental actions - which I term as "Trust Guidance".  For someone wondering about how to build trust, these are useful starting points.  These come from direct observations, and work with leaders and organizations.

1. Be visible.
Don't get too busy with meetings and spend most time within closed doors.  All stakeholders especially your team members have a high need to see their leaders.  As human beings, visibility is reassuring and builds certainty and confidence (neuroscience research findings support this).

2. Be respectful. 
Being respectful in your direct and virtual interactions, irrespective of organizational levels are huge motivators for individuals. The lower you go, the more charged up and motivated individuals are when they feel leaders found time for them, even to have a short conversation or acknowledgement. People also go through good and bad phases at work or personal lives.  Respecting their space, especially during bad phases go a long way to building commitment and trust.

3. Be aware of self and impact of one's behaviors and actions on others.
Take time to understand yourself, what drives you, your values, principles, strengths, development areas.  Self awareness is the starting point of any development effort. Next stage is to understand others around you and your impact of actions on people around.  Trust is a two way street and someone needs to extend a hand forward first to get the process of interactions into motion.

4. Be authentic, consistent in behaviors and actions.  
Be yourself. Don't try to be someone else. Most people are smart enough to see through 'fake' personalities. This does not indicate the license to do whatever to be oneself, rather being aligned to  values and principles which are built as part of self awareness.  Practice what you preach.  Admit mistakes with accountability when they happen and share recognition when success is achieved.  It is also helpful to explain your thinking approach as people think differently about a certain topic and may struggle to see the rationale in another person's approach.

5. Be open to discussions, while being conscious of biases.
Having the openness to discuss aspects that you may not agree with and have a strong view about, may help you see many possibilities and ideas that are otherwise missed.  Sometimes, it helps to be open about the fact that you have a strong view for a certain reason.  It also encourages others to share ideas and thoughts with you without fear. Presence of fear is one of the biggest barriers to trust.  Nobody wants to be the 'emperor with the naked clothes' but there is a probability of unknowingly becoming one with and it becomes very difficult to call someone out when the perceived power distance is higher.  Being vulnerable, even to some extent is a big factor for others to see the humanness and accessibility.

6. Be fair in approach and communicate, especially tough choices.
People can live with tough choices if they feel it was based on a fair process and they're not being misled into believing so. Many times, lack of visibility to the process or the way it was communicated or absence of it, result in difficult scenarios and contradictions for everyone involved.

7. Reflect constantly and make necessary changes.
Take out some thinking time with yourself or with your social network, coaches or mentors who can help with your thinking process and getting to more clarity on changes and actions. Everyone has a different scenario to think about and there are no perfect answers that address all scenarios. Observing, reflecting and adjusting your approaches accordingly would help you figure out the best approach for your environment.

Are there any other fundamental starting points in your view?

Best wishes on your leadership journey...

Absolute ‘Must Haves’ For High Performing Teams In Any Environment

How many teams does one work with in a lifetime?  A collection of multiple teams working efficiently towards common goals are fundamental to the success of any program or organization.  It is therefore important for leaders to build a shared understanding and definition for high performance (individual and team).  After having worked in and with various diverse teams as a member and consultant (sometimes ones with major issues), the following factors or elements seem ‘non negotiable’, in order to develop a high performing team.  

1. Self & Social Awareness - Self awareness is the fundamental building block of any development effort, either at the individual or team level.  Strong self and social awareness are consciously developed using appropriate tools or assessments (eg. Team Management Profile) and conscious practices.  If practiced well in a consistent manner, they result in a high degree of personal trust, and creation of “friend, not foe”/“towards, not away” frames (Daniel Goleman’s ‘Social Intelligence’, David Rock’s ‘Quiet Leadership’). The leader spends time with team members actively listening, coaching and empowering (not controlling or answering questions always). He/she is conscious about keeping his or her own ego and biases under check. The perception of fairness within the team is strong. Enabling a learning environment ensures that team members are encouraged to stretch, acknowledge mistakes & learn to make necessary adjustments with accountability.  Team members feel encouraged to flourish and find meaning in their work, not restricted or controlled. 

2. Key Stakeholders/Outside-In Perspective - These teams are aware of and always work with the key stakeholder perspectives (Dave Ulrich & Norm Smallwood use the term, "Outside-In"), while developing their Points of View.  To start with, they map out key internal and external stakeholders and work towards building strong relationships.

3. Purpose of Existence - Through the leaders initiative and facilitation, the team builds together clear, inspiring answers to these key questions: Why do we exist as a team? What is our common vision and purpose? How do we achieve value for our key stakeholders?

4. Clarity of Roles/Responsibilities - There is a strong understanding of each others’ roles and responsibilities, and how they practically interface with each other. These are aligned with the core objectives. I’ve found this area to be a big cause of frustration and conflicts within teams and the reality is that it is very difficult to document everything into a single ‘roles & responsibilities’ document in today’s constantly evolving environments. In cases where misalignment or confusion appears, clarity needs to be forged through constant open dialogues (facilitated by the leader or an expert). This will work smoothly only if the social and self awareness competencies of the team have been consciously developed in the beginning.     

5. Diversity - For a high performing team, diversity in thinking, work preferences and approaches are essential. Mutually complementary and supporting skills ensure that there is a healthy spread of task, behavioral preferences and strengths.  Diversity has the potential to create more stress and challenging environments in the beginning, sometimes resulting in in negative conflicts but the potential for achievement is much higher if the social and awareness factors are addressed proactively. Constructive challenges help a team push a team further, without needing to wait for external stimuli.  Managing diversity can also serve as a strong test and development for the leader’s maturity, emotional intelligence and leadership skills. Michael Watkins (First Hundred Days) noted that organizations can be like organisms - they repel any new or foreign body entering the system. Diversity keeps a team open and sensitive to competitive challenges or strategic shifts and challenges 'herd' mentality.

6. Focus/Priorities - Most teams get inundated with demands over time and have the constant challenge of delivering more than they can support.  High performing teams and leaders build clarity around the right priorities and results, through reflection, active dialogues, alignment with key stakeholders and focusing their intense efforts accordingly. The performance management and reward systems are aligned accordingly. This also relates to clarity on goals, expectations and progress reviews at the individual level.  In his recent HBR article “The Focused Leader”, Daniel Goleman noted that a primary task of leadership is to direct attention.

For any leader of a team, it is helpful to ask oneself what percentage of time is spent reflecting on or discussing these topics - individually and with the team (especially during the early phases of a team’s forming and norming stages)? Most teams spend majority of their time discussing practical issues at hand or technical topics.  If a leader does not facilitate and enable the building blocks of team development especially in the early stages, and constantly follow-up on these elements, she or he will spend a lot more time later thinking about and sorting out related issues.  

It is never too late to start. This important team development capability needs to be built either internally with HR support or with external experts.  These factors become even more relevant and important for senior level teams with high impact on the overall organisation.  

Are there any other ‘must-haves’ in your view?

Best wishes...

'The Leadership Code' - Applications for Global Leaders

The topic of effective leadership has been thought about and dissected from various perspectives.  I have also spent quite a bit of time reflecting and learning from various angles (recent posts - http://tojoeapen.blogspot.in/2014/01/leading-world-food-for-thought-for.html, http://theillusionofwork.wordpress.com/2013/07/16/what-do-we-need-from-our-leaders/), while observing, experiencing and working with leaders on practical aspects.  

I got an opportunity to read the draft of 'The Leadership Code' book written by Dave Ulrich, Norm Smallwood, and Kate Sweetman few years back.  My recent RBL group partner certification on the topic got me thinking again about related experiences, and its relevance globally.  The Leadership Code work reviews various models and research works and presents a strong, consolidated ('meta') view.  Having worked with global leaders, managers and HR over the years, I felt it would be beneficial to share some related thoughts and observations.  From my own experience, leaders undoubtedly have a huge impact (through their direct or indirect actions and behaviors) on how people within an organization feel and engage with customers and external stakeholders, and thereby how the external stakeholders perceive an organization through their interactions, connecting to results.

TLC recommends that the fundamental areas of focus for an effective leader include Personal Proficiency, Strategy, Execution, Talent Management and future Human Capital Development. 

In my observation, many leaders seem to spent majority of their time thinking about and working on the execution area.  It is natural, as most individuals are promoted to their leadership positions because they are very strong in execution.  The 'leadership passages' (Leadership Pipeline - Charan, Drotter, Noel) or transitions require leaders to reflect and rethink their approaches and practices, as they progress through their journey.  When it comes to leadership development programs, a lot of the focus seems to be on Personal Proficiency.  This is of course an important area but hopefully would not be at the expense of others.  Building a strategy might be less complicated for some leaders but communicating it consistently across and engaging with the organization through to the front lines, making it practical and aligning with the performance management system (which enables right execution) are complex steps.  It is important to note the distinction between execution at an individual level and execution at the organization level (requires different approaches).  Talent management tools exist in many organizations but what makes them valuable is an indepth understanding of the organization's talent and key drivers through day to day interactions and applications.  When future Human Capital Development is not given serious attention, the succession pipelines dry up or we miss to look at the critical roles in a changing environmental context with the relevant talent, resulting in heavy business impact.

A recent post by GE's CLO & VP of executive development Raghu Krishamoorthy, mentioned that most of their leaders, including their chairman spent at least 30% of their time on people related topics. Competent HR professionals and systems can play a huge role as enablers and support in building a balanced view and practical approach.  

An important question I would leave you with is - to consider if you would need to and how you could find a healthy balance of these areas on your leadership agenda.  The proportions may shift depending on business life cycle and other practical considerations but if as a leader, you miss out on eg. future Human Capital Development area citing business and operational emergencies, the probability of never getting out of them increases and building a sustainable organization for the long run remains a dream.

It helps for every organization (starting with top leaders) to clarify how leaders help balance today's priorities and future success, and the important role that leaders play to build sustainable organizations for the long run.

RBL Group also finds that while around 60 to 70% of leadership competency models reflect TLC, around 30% would ideally involve differentiators related to the organization's strategy and brand (which leads to a distinct 'Leadership Brand').

Wishing you happiness, success and wisdom...

A Decade of Cross Cultural Experiences in Four Fundamental Practices

After spending over a decade of my life in Finland/Europe and the U.S., and having had the great opportunity to interact and work with talented individuals and leaders from various cultural backgrounds and journeys, I wanted to synthesize and share some of my key experiences and lessons in cross-cultural experiences.  

Working and living across countries/cultures may present great opportunities and at the same time, they hold numerous challenges. The ability to work effectively with, lead and manage across cultures are competencies that are becoming very important in a world that continues to get smaller and closer, due to rapid advances in technology and social media. As glamorous as it may seem from a distance, adapting to and succeeding in a very different culture are not at all easy. Those who choose to be ignorant of this topic will lose great opportunities for personal and professional growth.  

There're numerous studies and research articles on this topic and some of my thinking has been influenced by them.  

"If you come to another's turf with empathy, sensitivity and open ears - what the Zen masters call 'beginner's mind' - you're halfway home". – Tom Peters

1. Respect

Being aware, sensitive to and noticing some of the key themes, norms and behaviors in a new environment constitute an important starting point. This can help one to understand how things work, life patterns flow and what is valued in that setting. Many of the norms would be very different from one’s own conditioning and would seem strange initially. Being respectful to individuals and cultural norms helps to adapt faster to any new environment. One would also need to be respectful of the differences and try to understand the background without being judgmental. There is a possibility of feeling disrespected or ignored, in some instances. Chances are that, not everyone in a different culture is aware of the nuances of your culture and interaction styles. Irrespective of how you feel initially, your mature approach and respectful presence can increase your acceptance, credibility and prevent you from getting stuck in a frustration zone.  

2. Openness To New Experiences Without Judging

This is vital for making progress in a different cultural setting. Stephen Covey's teaching, "Seek first to understand, then to be understood" is a very useful advice to keep in mind while interacting with people from a different culture. It is useful to be aware of our own biases and that our biases and environmental conditioning may easily lead us into the questioning, judging, confusing and eventually distrusting zone.  Individuals from different backgrounds can look at the same scenario and perceive it very differently.  Categorizing something in your mind as superior or inferior, right or wrong, good or bad etc. will impact your own thinking ability and responses to situations and people.  Open communication with authenticity is fundamental to avoiding misunderstandings. During initial stages of interactions, it's useful to explain the reason behind doing or asking for something that impacts others, and clarifying the same with others without creating a ‘threat’ state, when there are questions in your mind. This avoids confusion, especially in the initial stages of relationship building.

3. Flexibility

As mentioned earlier, I realized that my own way of seeing a topic was very different from how others from a different background related to the same topic.  Being flexible relates to building self-awareness and using that awareness effectively to understand and manage through various scenarios.  This would also mean shifting/stretching ways of thinking and adjusting/ changing one's own approaches.  Taking the responsibility to tackle an unpleasant situation with maturity and emotional intelligence requires a lot of flexibility, to flex one's own thinking frames. It's very useful to have a positive 'forgiving' and 'forgetful/let go' attitude with unpleasant experiences, while being aware of one's own learning.  Very seldom does anyone win an argument of being right or wrong.  'Co-regulation' beyond 'self-regulation' is very helpful.  Vicious responses only result in cycles of vicious interactions and stress, which take the relationships further into the red zone.  On the other hand, not engaging in a proactive, positive conversation results in increasing distance.  

4. Coping with the unknown and fear of failure

There're a lot of unknowns in a new environment. Finding information through formal and informal channels and making personal connections are very helpful to put one at ease initially. One has to also find relevant ways to accept, understand and cope with stress related to uncertainties of the new environment. It generally will take a certain amount of time before adjusting and feeling comfortable in a different cultural environment.  Patience is fundamental to work through times of frustration, disappointment and negativity.  It may not be uncharacteristic to go through a feeling of ‘being lost’ at times.  It is really important to find one's own support from ‘comfort zones’, secure bases and ‘connections’ in those situations.

It is helpful to be prepared for mistakes and misunderstandings along the way. Fear of failure can inhibit people from experimenting or experiencing new things, which reduce the impact of the cultural experience, knowledge and personal development. The normal tendency might be to stay within one's own comfort zones most of the time. 

According to a leading expert in this field Fons Trompenaars, "We need a certain amount of humility and a sense of humor to discover cultures other than our own; a readiness to enter a room in the dark and stumble over unfamiliar furniture until the pain in our shins reminds us of where things are."

Your willingness and openness to step into the new world can take you to a totally new dimension of personal growth, deep connections and confidence.  Enjoy the journey.  Best wishes…

Please share your valuable learning and experiences!

 Note:  The topic of 'culture' can be reviewed at different levels or frames.  I've tried to focus on the country culture aspect here.  Some of these practices can be useful in working through other aspects, like organizational culture differences.